My Light Blue Firework
by I Have My Reasons Why
Summary: "I sneak out in the middle of the night, go to the drug store, and buy red hair dye. I stand in my bathroom, look at the box, and start crying. I have to do this, though. To remember him." Cat's hair doesn't really have anything to do with cupcakes. Cori.


** I have been reading a lot of Cat angst stories so I thought I'd write one! Hope you enjoy :)**

_**Disclaimer**_**: I do not own Victorious. But I do own a journal named Bob. Dan Schnieder is jealous of that.**

**I give you: M y L i g h t B l u e F i r e w o r k **

"…Cat?"

"Yeah, Tor?" I laugh, poking Tori. I love the nickname "Tor". It rhymes with store; like SkyStore! SkyStore Tor! He-he.

"Why did you dye your hair red?"

- F L A S H B A C K -

I am walking home, licking my ice cream cone. I like ice cream. I always go get some from Freezy Queen when Rex and Jade are mean to me. Sometimes, I think that Rex and Jade should get married, because they're both so mean and deserve each other. I would go to their wedding and wear a pretty dress and dance around all by myself.

It's always by myself.

Jade has Beck. Andre always has some girl. Robbie at least has Rex to keep him company. I have never had anyone. Except my little brother, Seth. I know they say he has "problems". And apparently his problems are harder than math problems. I find that hard to believe because math is hard! He listens though.

"Seth!" I yell, giggling. I'm in our little house. It's so cute, it looks like little rabbits live there making chocolate and rainbows. (Because that's what bunnies do!) "Seth?" I hear a few pops, like fireworks.

"Fireworks!" I yell, running out back. I love fireworks! They're so pretty. They remind me of me, exploding with bright colors! Except for my dumb brown hair, it's not colorful. If Jade were a firework, she would be a black one. You wouldn't even be able to see it. Beck would be a mellow colored firework, like calming dull yellows and oranges. Andre would be green, because he makes everyone have a little hope. Robbie would be gray, because he's so lonely. And Rex…Rex would be red. For hatred. And Seth would be a light blue firework. For love.

But they aren't fireworks. Poo. It's my cousin Jesse wearing his clown suit and he has his water gun. He's so silly! "Jesse!" I laugh, running to him. He runs from me, though. Double poo.

I look down, confused. Seth is lying on the ground, asleep, covered in ketchup. "Sethhhhhh!" I giggle. I poke him but he doesn't wake up. One time he woke up talking about chocolate syrup covered letters in the mail. I looked in the mailbox after that and there were only regular letters.

It looks like Seth isn't waking up anytime soon. Triple poo. I go back inside and draw a purple bunny making chocolate and a green bunny making rainbows. I laugh, and hang them up next to the tiger I colored. These weren't natural! While I'm laughing, Mom comes in.

"Hi, honey!" She says, kissing me on the side of the head. She gets red lipstick in her hair. Yuck! Red is a mean color. "Where's your brother?"

I laugh. "Jackson's in college, silly!"

"No, your _younger _brother." She says with a sigh.

"Oh! He's outside sleeping, cousin Jesse shot him with a water gun! But shhhh, Seth's sleeping! Plus he's eaten ketchup because it's all over him!" Mom stops making dinner.

"How long ago did that happen?"

"About three minutes ago." Mom runs outside super fast, like she's trying to win a track competition! She comes back and screams into the phone and I don't listen because yelling isn't nice. I sit and look at my drawings, still laughing over the silly unnatural colors!

Mom rushes me into our car and we follow a big truck with loud sirens and flashing red lights. I close my eyes because red is a bad color. I want it to stop. _BAD RED! _I think to myself.

"Mom, where are we going?" She doesn't answer. We arrive at a hospital, and on the way in I wave and giggle at the nice lady at the desk I talked to when Rex almost died. My mom drags me to the waiting room. I wish I had a magic wand so I could change the name to hurry room so we didn't have to wait so long. I don't even know what we're waiting for.

"Lauren Valentine?" A doctor asks.

"Yes?" My mother stands up and so do I. I'm sore from sitting and I want to dance around to get rid of the soreness but I don't because this doctor looks professional so I put on my professional business-like face.

"Your son has passed away. I'm very sorry but-"

"WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?" I explode. Like a firework. BOOM! Except this time I turn into a Rex firework; red and mean. Mom doesn't say anything, she just sits and cries and looks at the pretty carpet.

"Seth Valentine was shot several times in the abdomen with a shot gun. There was too much blood-"

"BLOOD?" I yell. BOOM! I'm being like Rex and Jade; I'm yelling and being a red and black firework. "My cousin Jesse shot him with a _water_ gun! And that was _ketchup_ not blood!" The doctor just looks at me like he's sad. I don't know why, I'm going to go home and Seth will be there and he'll try to lick his eyeball and everything will be normal.

On the car ride home, I fall asleep. I dream of red blood and real guns. There's a loud siren and a flashing red light. But the light is too bright. "TOO BRIGHT!" And the siren is too loud. "TOO LOUD!" Then I'm watching the clown shoot Seth and I'm watching him bleed and I try so hard to believe (_so hard_) that it's just ketchup and a water gun and I want to take the gun away and hug my baby brother (_and never let go_) but deep in my heart I know it's real blood and a real gun and there are red and black fire works. I don't like them; they are mean fireworks with mean colors. I want my old firework Cat back; the one who was neon green and pink and bright yellow and orange and I don't want to be red anymore, red is bad and that's how I lost my little brother. He's gone because red is mean and there was too much red. So much red.

I wake up and I'm crying. "Mom, Seth died." I say simply. She cries really hard and the sounds she's making scare me and I'm already scared enough and I want a hug but not from Robbie or Andre or even Jade, but Seth because he holds me when I cry and doesn't let go until I do and if I were hugging him he wouldn't be dead.

I go home and I can't sleep because if I sleep then I'll dream and if I dream I'll have that nightmare and the first one was too scary. So I sneak out in the middle of the night and go to the drug store and buy red hair dye. I stand in my bathroom, look at the box, and start crying. I have to do this, though. To remember him.

- F L A S H B A C K -

"Because I love red velvet cupcakes, silly!" I lie, giggling at Tori.

She laughs and ruffles my hair like a dog. I'm not a dog, I'm a Cat. A lying cat. But if I could be a dog, I would be a golden doodle!

I feel bad for lying. Lying is more red fireworks. And I really hate red velvet cupcakes. My mom told me their secret. (They're really just chocolate cupcakes with red food coloring! But shhhhh, don't tell anyone, I don't want to ruin the red velvet cupcake's rep.)

In reality, I hate my hair. Red is a terrible color. But this is the only way I can remind myself of the red firework of hate that killed Seth.

This way I'll always have a dark piece of my little Light Blue Firework.

**Did you like it? Shall I continue? Review!**


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